Oct. 23rd, 2011

next steps

Oct. 23rd, 2011 03:36 pm
I met with my career counselor Friday, and we discussed various things, like what I might set as goals for the rest of this year (which is not very long!). I am resisting schedule-setting for my monster book and other things a bit because I really don't know how much time I'll have in the winter term - I'll be done with the textbook (unless it comes back that soon and I have to do the new edits), but I'll be teaching two highly time-consuming classes, and for at least one of them I'll be doing all my own grading. For the other I may have someone else doing some grading. But I'm going to be writing my lecture notes essentially from scratch - in one case completely, and in the other nearly completely. I may change my "no work at home" policy a bit since I kind of prefer grading at home, but hopefully I can figure out a way to do so that I can still reap the mental health benefits of the current system.

Back to Friday. She asked what she can do for me, and I said besides keeping on with pushing me to think longer term and keeping me on track, maybe we could do a slower, gentler version of her weekend entrepreneurship workshop. She gave me the handout they use for that, but it was completely intimidating - it's the one that made me seize up and feel suddenly like I was going to cry. I think this will be okay, partially because it won't be a surprise, and partially because I've realized I really don't *want* another job, so I need these tools to hasten the day when I am completely self-employed. If the monsters come out as well as I hope, I think that book will sell really well - and I have nearly enough ideas for a sequel already.

There is always tutoring to help pay the bills.

Lately I've really been wanting to be in a band, funnily enough. I want to put on leather pants and a tank top and stalk the stage with a microphone. All of these things that probably go with the realization that I would like to be somewhere other than I am.

Actually I mentioned on Friday that I'd had two coughs already this fall and that's unusual for me, and she said a friend of hers who's into some kind of naturopathy or fung shui or something said that you are susceptible to coughs when you aren't saying things you want to. I really don't go in for the metaphysical stuff but that condition surely holds of me! Though the department secretary mentioned when I was in Friday that the chair had given her some paperwork related to making next year's teaching schedule, and I think getting the teaching assignment request forms will precipitate the moment of truth. I wanted to talk to my career counselor first, and then to the one department member I've confided in, before making any general announcements. It will be a strange state to live in.

This is related to my realization that I don't want another job. When I announce that I'm leaving my position and people ask for what, I want to be able to say crafting, full stop. Not crafting cut with professional organizing (which I've mostly thrown by the wayside because it would take too much marketing and startup, for an hourly rate I could probably get with tutoring), not crafting cut with some part-time job somewhere that serves no long-term purpose. I would be interested in public health, and if I were in any way qualified for a job in that field I would be happy to say "public health with a side of art" - which perhaps could still come to happen; I have research to do. Perhaps I'm more qualified than I believe.

Well, this is amply long enough. Tomorrow I'll write about my weekend crafting adventures.



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